Pets In The Room?

There are times when you're getting it on or masturbating in the comfort of your own home, but your home includes the animals that you love very dearly.

What do you do when you're about to have sex?  What about during masturbation?

On one hand, they're not human children.  They view procreation very differently than humans do (that is, unless you somehow have a pet dolphin with a tank in your bedroom).  They probably have a different understanding of what's going on.

Do you just go for it regardless of if the animal is looking right at you?

Or do you make sure to take them outside the room?

Teaching a Sex Ed Course

In the beginning of the year, I had the amazing opportunity to work with Partners in Sex Education to teach a class at a Greater Boston high school.

I had the option of teaching to a class of 9th graders or to upperclassmen, and being that I've had a lot of experience in working with middle school students in my previous day job I chose to go with the youngest group.

While I was extremely excited for this opportunity, was extremely nervous in the beginning.  It had been many months since I had done work with kids.  Would I do well in the class?  What if they have attitude?  Will I be able to reach them?

Sure, I had a lot of experience in working with youth.  Sure, I had a lot of experience in speaking about sex and sexual health.  But I had never combined the two worlds before.

Once I got started, though, I have to say I'm extremely proud of myself for having done a weeks worth of education with those students.

What I felt so naive about, however, was the fact that kids will find a way to get information, even if that information is incorrect.  Throughout the week, I had to repeat several times that porn was not only for ADULT pleasure, but it is also the worst place to seek correct information.

Most of the class consisted of boys, with about 5 girls among them.  It was clear that some of the terminology they were using when they asked anonymous questions was generated from things they saw or heard in porn. For example, "cumshot" is definitely not something used in every day language.

I felt silly for being a bit shocked, especially considering that even I looked at porns when I was younger to get information!  And with the availability of information that is more prevalent these days, I really shouldn't have been as shocked as I was.

Nonetheless, I had a great time working with that class.  They had a lot of great questions, and were engaged.  I wish I could have had a month with them!!  There's so much to cover and so little time to do it - much like how parties are.

My only hope is that they were able to retain some of the information, and that they seek help with trusted adults if need be.

Working on Defenses

Do you prefer someone who is being more direct?  Or would you prefer that someone is more subtle and polite?

Perhaps it depends on the situation?

Well, last night, I was at a friend's housewarming party after having finished working at a party earlier that evening.  At some point, I was asked what I did.

Being that I didn't have time to switch purses, I brought out the product binder to show them what I was talking about.

Photo by Najmat

At one point, I overheard someone make a comment about the fact that I was talking about penis rings.  So, I turned around and said, "Oh, Hi.  My name is Cecilia, and I sell sex toys."

Not a bad introduction, if I do say so myself.

Well, one person turned around and said that she's skeptical about sex toys because she's allergic to latex.  I told her that we have tons of toys that are great for those with a latex allergy, specifically some that are medical-grade silicone.

She said she still couldn't be sure, but her posture and body language just exuded the fact that she was extremely uncomfortable.

I felt really awkward, all of a sudden, like my good advice was not good enough.  Even though I had tried to  be really professional with her, she just seemed extremely resistant to anything I had to say.  I knew it wasn't the time to ask her anything more.

Luckily, some of the other people in her group were a bit more open minded, and we had a conversation about the state of sex education for youth and adults.  One of them even asked for my business card.

While I don't expect that everyone would be as comfortable as I am with talking about sex, I guess I was just not ready to come across someone like that at this particular house party.  It's silly, really, that I would assume that.  But I did.

I think this is something I'd like to improve on:  When someone puts up that kind of wall, how can I get them to peek over the top of it even for a second?